My Parents Moved to Utah
After Justin passed away, the boys and I lived with my parents in Minnesota and then Colorado. They helped me raise my newborn twins and carried us through a time when I couldn’t do it alone. Eventually, they left for a three year church mission, and I had to decide what life would look like for us next.
When they left, I felt strongly that moving to Utah made the most sense. Justin’s parents lived here, many of our friends were here, and I knew I would need support as I learned how to stand on my own again. So I packed up our life in Colorado and moved to Utah.
DO WE HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH JUSTINS FAMILY?
My parents moved to Toronto during those three years, and we stayed connected from a distance while all of us continued growing in our own ways. About a year before they were scheduled to come home, something unexpected happened. My dad received a job offer in Salt Lake City and called to get my thoughts.
MY DAD SHARING HIS THOUGHTS ON US MOVING
At the same time, I was in a season of uncertainty. I had started dating Grant, and things were becoming more serious. My dad already knew Grant from when we grew up in Colorado together, but it felt like the right moment to share that my life was starting to look different than I once thought it would. I told my dad honestly that I wasn’t sure where I would end up and that I would hate for them to make plans around me.
I also shared that I was in a more secure place than I had been when the twins were babies. I didn’t need the same level of support anymore. He gently wondered if we might ever live with them again someday, and while I loved the idea in theory, I knew I was finally learning how to stand on my own.
As excited as I was about the idea of them moving to Utah, I wanted to make sure it was their choice, without any pressure from me. I also loved having a reason to go back to Colorado. Colorado will always hold a special place in my heart. It’s where I grew up. It’s where Justin and I built a life. It’s where so many memories live. The thought of my parents still being tied to Colorado felt comforting too.
So for a long time, we all sat in the unknown.
Toward the end of their time away, my parents made their final decision. They got home from their mission in July and my dad started the job in August. They found a house and in December, they moved to Utah.
I don’t think I can fully explain the feeling of having them close again. It feels like a deep exhale. We spent Christmas Eve together in their new home, and it was one of those moments that quietly settles into your heart and stays there. My mom set up a room with twin beds so the boys can sleep over and visit often. Watching my kids run through their grandparents house, already making memories, has been incredibly healing.
My parents still have our cabin near Rocky Mountain National Park, which means we’ll always have reasons to go back to Colorado. I can easily see them living half the year there and half the year here someday. Best of both worlds.
Mostly, I just feel grateful. Grateful for parents who show up. Grateful for a family that adapts as life changes. Grateful to have them close again in this season of rebuilding, healing, and becoming. Sometimes life doesn’t look the way we imagined, but sometimes, in the middle of all the unexpected turns, it still finds a way to bring the people we love a little closer to home.
What we did for Christmas
This was our first Christmas at home, and our first Christmas with Grant. For the past three years, I chose to travel because I knew my limits with grief and how hard being alone would feel. Last year we spent Christmas in NYC with my sister, and it was truly magical but this year, it felt really good not to pack Christmas up and take it with me.